post number 241....

since i started blogging, almost everything i say seems negative, uncontrolled and somewhat immature...

and reading back, i realise, some things that i say does not reflect my true feelings and desire....

i am starting to doubt i got the guts to tell something so straightforwardly-truthful to anyone anymore LOL

i am getting bored being someone i think i was, and i am not convinced i am actually liking the new me.

yeah, this is gonna be another freaking negative blogpost. i have no regrets being who i am really, its just sometimes, i tend to feel left out and unwanted. sometimes, i feel like i am not in the spotlight anymore.. and that "sometime" might be a longer time than i thought would be.

nope, i am not interested to look for any guys anymore... nor am i looking for richness and fame...
i just want to feel wanted, sometimes.

obviously this feeling is kinda deep and dense for some people to understand... which is not making me feel any better.

oh well. the world does not consists of only me. i have to share it with 7 billion other people...

only in my world, can i ever be happy.