yeah, not being thick-faced or anything, but i somehow realise, there used to be people who looked up to me. follow in my footsteps, act the way i acted and wanted what i wanted.
now they are all grown up, all changed, became someone else and someone special and talented......
while i sit at the side bench and watch them achieve success one after another.
i used to be the leader of the group, but now i am cast aside for them to lead on another group.
useless huh?
amazingly, i know i never lost respect for myself. (hopefully some still respects me)
no matter how disappointed i am with my life and my achievements, i never once think i am the worst of the lot... coz i know, there are people that are a lot worse than me.
i am certainly proud that once upon a time i was being first at something, no matter how messed up it was, i am happy that i went through that phrase of life.
certainly, its impossible to regain that feeling now since i have no one to lead anymore. LOL!!
but i guess its fine, i can still lead myself to the path i want to thread upon...
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I know i am a very direct person, and those who knows me well, or had the chance to communicate with me would know that i am a direct person. i hate beating around the bush (unless i am trying to prank a person or i am digging secrets).. so why do people have to be "offended" by what i say? knowing fully well i wont compliment someone unless i mean it, and i wont give face if u did something wrong... (and the same one again and again)................ who wont get fed up and screw ur ass up??
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I like compliments. even those that has a sarcastic tone to it. why? it brightens my day. I like how the Brits will go when (lets say) you finished a project.. "WELL DONE! you did a GREAT JOB!"
see how THAT compliment puts a smile on your face immediately?
Too bad, being Malaysians, we were brought up in such a negative environment. even when u achieve something, the parents will not say what the brits would say...
for example, a 12 yr old kid came home telling the mother bout the results.
child: Mom!! i got 5 As in the mid term exam! look look!
Mom: oh really? *grabs report card and scan through it*
Child: So, can i have the PS2 you promised me? >w< *high in hopes and anticipation*
Mom: 5As also no use, you are not in the TOP 10 of the class! You are number 14 in the class, still not good enough! no PS2 for u!
Child: *shocked*
=_= what happened to the compliments, the rubbing of the head, the SMILE to the child for something achieved...etc etc???
I AM SO thankful... MY mom wasn't like that.
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~**[Hi]Me**~
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